In search for Infinity

If reading too much about cameras could cause somebody to cough out blood, then I would have died on a pool of my own blood right now. A sea of deep, thick, slimy blood that screams of the owner's masochistic torture of self-induced GASing.

You see, I've been searching for the perfect camera to replace my sacrificial lamb, Nirvana, for weeks now. After giving my enlightenment away to some anti-social gadget freak in exchange for some cash, I went ahead and searched for my Mugen. From tipidpc.com to sulit.com.ph to henryscameraphoto.com, Chrome-san already knows them by heart. It's been my daily routine for the last 2-3 weeks. Even my cousin asked me what do I get from staring at the prices of cameras all day, I said "I was hoping they would magically go down so I could buy one." But of course, they don't and what would magically appear were the little auras I get whenever I have a migraine. If I feel the need to stretch and go out, I would go to my Mecca and have blood oozing out from my eyes and ears instead. I've been to 24k, Meyer's, Henry's, M20, Avenue and all the other camera stores in Hidalgo, I could tell which stores offer which by now so call me the "Hidalgo-hime". All hail the Hidalgo-himesama! OTL

I was so desperate that I even ditched a meet-up with a friend to kiss someone's you-know-what, hoping to please that someone so she could become my Daddy Long Legs and I, her Judy Abbott. See? The lowest of the low.

But what can I do? This is the first time my heart thumped for something aside from paper bishounen. It's thumping so hard that I can barely sleep at night, it beats so fast that it hurts. Whenever I close my eyes, I could see images

Of Ichu's swelling belly

Of Utoy, Jigen and Yael's smiles

Of the moments I might miss

So I stay up, stare at the numbers

and dream awake.